Mad

We just moved rapidly past the 2.5 year mark of unemployment--do we really count those five weeks of glory in MA, I think not--and we are still battling this demon.  I must preface this by saying that I am in the worst mood ever today, a mood I have not been in in quite a while.  I cannot seem to be able to get away from myself and my own dark thoughts of what will happen to us and when this nightmare will be over.  Adding insult to injury, I had a moment this morning and resumed trolling the job boards.  Big mistake.  Obviously, I have become a self-proclaimed job search queen given my experience and it enrages me to see the same positions open month after month after month.  Seriously, what is going on in these companies?  Are they planning to fill these jobs (or at least purge them from the boards) or are the hiring managers so paralyzed by their quest for perfection (and the glut of potential candidates) that they cannot make a decision.  Let's face it, I have been accused of being far too black and white in my approach to life, grounded in realism and unable to 'lighten up' and 'just be,' but I also know that some companies have to be hiring someone, somewhere...no?

I have to believe that the law of averages would dictate that with all the resumes we have sent out and all the networking that has been done by both my husband, myself and my mom, there has to be a job for which my husband is suitable somewhere in the continental US.  For heaven's sake, he has close to 30 years experience in the same field and while I know he has some things going against him, his skill set has to add value to the efficient running of a creative services department somewhere in the nation.

Obviously, I am also a control freak and the absolute best way to throw me over the edge is to present me with a huge problem and then allow me no way to proactively find the solution--oh, yeah, and then just keep it moving in an unchanging, stifling, slow crawl ad infinitum (throw in two trials moving concurrently in exactly the same manner and you really have a recipe for disaster).

I have begun to feel quite akin to that lowly hamster in the wheel.  Calgon take me away!