A few years ago when my children were attending a school back east, one of my best friends who worked off the same exit as the school, handed me a cheat sheet of sorts. Because she had traveled the same road for years, she had written down a variety of detours for how to get to the school if the main highway had too much traffic. Although we lived only three exits from the school, the most direct route was a main thoroughfare that could make the trip either fifteen minutes or an hour depending on the flow of traffic. Armed with my cheat sheet, I knew I could simply get off the road at any of the three exits and reduce our travel time considerably. I wish my life had those viable detours right now. Actually, I would settle for just one. Detours to my life right now set off cataclysmic domino effects which all seem to lead to dead ends, not faster or better ways of taking the journey.
Another friend tells me that she often needs to find moments to 'just be' which is her way of finding 'clarity in the moment.' Clarity? In the moment? I am never 'in the moment' because my mind is constantly assessing situations, prioritizing and weighing potential ramifications of all that I do. I have been told that my mind is like a computer with way too many programs open and running in the background--always. I once bought a yoga DVD to try to help in my quest for calm. I ended up yelling at the TV after 10 minutes because the yoga master was moving so slowly I had lost my patience. It made a nice donation item. I hope the recipient found the calm and focus that had eluded me.
I am still looking for that detour. Maybe one day soon, I will get a new cheat sheet so that I may skirt some of this traffic in my mind.
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